A Million Times Over
Sometimes we fall so deep into sins and our lusts and that it seems to us that there is no way to get back what we’ve broken and lost. We quickly drown in a cloud of depression and self-persecution. A million times over and over finding ourselves in the same dark holes looking for a light and a way out.
Luckily, Rebbe Natan teaches us an amazing fundamental concept that is tailored to save us in this situation.
Rebbe Natan says;
Believe in yourself and in G-d and declare with great might – I believe in myself, I am not afraid! Why? Because I have an infinite soul, a Godly soul!
‘I know that Hashem is here with me even in the darkest places. Even if we’ve ruined and blemished things by sinning, Rebbe Nachman already told us: “If you believe that you can ruin, believe that you can fix.”
When we strengthen ourselves this way, by believing in and connecting to our infinite soul, we immediately awaken our soul from within.
Two inner forces – the battle
There are two forces within our brain which stem from the etz hadaat – the tree of the knowledge of good and bad. It is a constant battle between the two sides and it begins as soon as we fall into sin. And articularly into p’gam habrit – blemishing the holy covenant.
On the left side of our brain stands the evil force of Amalek which tells us: Look at yourself, you fell a million times over and over there is no way to come out of this, you’re finished!
But on the right side of our brain, opposing Amalek is the true Tzaddik.
And the Tzaddik screams out to us – there is no despair in the world! Don’t ever give up!
Even though you’ve fallen a million times over and it isn’t a simple thing. But in reality, who is the one that ruined? Only that ‘demon’ part inside of you which has nothing to do with your godly soul.
Go, connect to that infinite power, to your Neshama, to your infinite soul. Connect to the part of God that you possess.
We must know that the part of us that blemished is very limited in strength, but your soul is limitless and has the power to fix everything and to return in a blink of an eye!
All we have to do is believe in our soul and in our power to connect. Believe in the love of Hashem. Believe in His unconditional love.
The only thing the yetzer hara can do is to weaken our faith and our belief in our Godly soul. But if every time we fall into this sin we just get back up again and connect; our Godly soul will always win!
The dor hamabul (generation of the flood) who were so immersed in this sin were only destroyed because they stopped believing in themselves and in the ability to fix. If we lose faith that we can fix things, that’s when it’s game over, and there is nothing else we can really do.
But once we believe that we can fix it all, our soul takes over and shines its infinite light into even the darkest places.
This is what Rebbe Natan is teaching us, that the tikkun (rectification) for p’gam habrit – the sin of the covenant is that we must believe in ourselves and never give up!
We have to bind and connect ourselves to the Tzaddik, scream to Hashem and re-connect to our souls, and to that infinite Divine power within that can fix everything.
May we merit!